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101 Ways To Annoy People
Mar. 21st, 2008 | 12:37 am
i actually do about half of these things lol. yes, ive done the honk and wave!
1. Sing the Batman theme incessantly.
2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."
3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip..."
5. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
6. Amuse yourself for endless hours by hooking a camcorder to your TV and then pointing it at the screen. <
7. Speak only in a "robot" voice.
8. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.
9. Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will "swipe your grub".
10. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 98 copies.
11. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
12. Sniffle incessantly.
13. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.
14. Name your dog "Dog." 15. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
16. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think."
17. Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your "astronaut training."
18. Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace".
19. Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot."
20. Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with Lysol.
21. Practice making fax and modem noises.
22. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc:" them to your boss.
23. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
24. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.
25. Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and tell the neighbors you are a "spider person."
26. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with the prophesy."
27. Wear a special hip holster for your
remote control.
28. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment.
29. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.
30. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.
31. Give a play-by-play account of a persons every action in a nasal Howard Cosell voice.
32. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
33. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."
34. Drum on every available surface.
35. Staple papers in the middle of the page.
36. Ask 1-800 operators for dates.
37. Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copyright warnings.
38. Sew anti-theft detector strips
into peoples backpacks.
39. Hide dairy products in inaccessible places.
40. Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.
41. Set alarms for random times.
42. Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon.
43. Instead of Gallo, serve Night Train next Thanksgiving.
44. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise.
45. Honk and wave to strangers.
46. Dress only in clothes colored Hunters Orange.
47. Change channels five minutes before the end of every show.
48. Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climactic parts of rental movies.
49. Wear your pants backwards.
50. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints by the cash register.
51. Begin all your sentences with "ooh la la!"
52. ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
53. only type in lowercase.
54. dont use any punctuation either
55. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
56. Pay for your dinner with pennies.
57. Tie jingle bells to all your clothes.
58. Repeat everything someone says, as a question.
59. Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in random spots on all of someone's roadmaps.
60. Inform everyone you meet of your personal Kennedy assassination/UFO/ O.J Simpson conspiracy theories.
61. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, its gone now."
62. Light road flares on a birthday cake.
63. Wander around a restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley.
64. Leave tips in Bolivian currency.
65. Demand that everyone address you as "Conquistador."
66. At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks.
67. When Christmas caroling, sing "Jingle Bells, Batman smells" until physically restrained.
68. Wear a cape that says "Magnificent One."
69. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
70. Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read.
71. Pretend your computer's mouse is a CB radio, and talk to it.
72. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "no, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.
73. Drive half a block.
74. Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.
75. Ask people what gender they are.
76. Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back.
77. Cultivate a Norwegian accent. If Norwegian, affect a Southern drawl.
78. Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, informing the curious that you don't want to fall off "in case the big one comes".
79. Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers brains, such as "Feliz Navidad", the Archies "Sugar" or the Mr. Rogers theme song.
80. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head. like a parakeet.
81. Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.
82. Leave your Christmas lights up and lit until September.
83. Change your name to "AaJohn Aaaaasmith" for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each "a."
84. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
85. Chew on pens that you've borrowed.
86. Wear a LOT of cologne.
87. Listen to 33rpm records at 45rpm speed, and claim the faster speed is necessary because of your "superior mental processing."
88. Sing along at the opera.
89. Mow your lawn with scissors.
90. At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batabatabata-suhWING-batter!"
91. Ask the waitress for an extra seat for your "imaginary friend."
92. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
93. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something
about "psychological profiles."
94. Stare at static on the TV and claim you can see a "magic picture."
95. Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times.
96. Never make eye contact.
97. Never break eye contact.
98. Construct elaborate "crop circles" in your front lawn.
99. Construct your own pretend "tricorder," and "scan" people with it, announcing the results.
100. Make appointments for the 31st of September.
101. Invite lots of people to other people's parties.
1. Sing the Batman theme incessantly.
2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."
3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip..."
5. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
6. Amuse yourself for endless hours by hooking a camcorder to your TV and then pointing it at the screen. <
7. Speak only in a "robot" voice.
8. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.
9. Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will "swipe your grub".
10. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 98 copies.
11. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
12. Sniffle incessantly.
13. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.
14. Name your dog "Dog." 15. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
16. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think."
17. Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your "astronaut training."
18. Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace".
19. Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot."
20. Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with Lysol.
21. Practice making fax and modem noises.
22. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc:" them to your boss.
23. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
24. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.
25. Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and tell the neighbors you are a "spider person."
26. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with the prophesy."
27. Wear a special hip holster for your
remote control.
28. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment.
29. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.
30. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.
31. Give a play-by-play account of a persons every action in a nasal Howard Cosell voice.
32. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
33. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."
34. Drum on every available surface.
35. Staple papers in the middle of the page.
36. Ask 1-800 operators for dates.
37. Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copyright warnings.
38. Sew anti-theft detector strips
into peoples backpacks.
39. Hide dairy products in inaccessible places.
40. Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.
41. Set alarms for random times.
42. Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon.
43. Instead of Gallo, serve Night Train next Thanksgiving.
44. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise.
45. Honk and wave to strangers.
46. Dress only in clothes colored Hunters Orange.
47. Change channels five minutes before the end of every show.
48. Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climactic parts of rental movies.
49. Wear your pants backwards.
50. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints by the cash register.
51. Begin all your sentences with "ooh la la!"
52. ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
53. only type in lowercase.
54. dont use any punctuation either
55. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
56. Pay for your dinner with pennies.
57. Tie jingle bells to all your clothes.
58. Repeat everything someone says, as a question.
59. Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in random spots on all of someone's roadmaps.
60. Inform everyone you meet of your personal Kennedy assassination/UFO/ O.J Simpson conspiracy theories.
61. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, its gone now."
62. Light road flares on a birthday cake.
63. Wander around a restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley.
64. Leave tips in Bolivian currency.
65. Demand that everyone address you as "Conquistador."
66. At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks.
67. When Christmas caroling, sing "Jingle Bells, Batman smells" until physically restrained.
68. Wear a cape that says "Magnificent One."
69. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
70. Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read.
71. Pretend your computer's mouse is a CB radio, and talk to it.
72. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "no, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.
73. Drive half a block.
74. Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.
75. Ask people what gender they are.
76. Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back.
77. Cultivate a Norwegian accent. If Norwegian, affect a Southern drawl.
78. Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, informing the curious that you don't want to fall off "in case the big one comes".
79. Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers brains, such as "Feliz Navidad", the Archies "Sugar" or the Mr. Rogers theme song.
80. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head. like a parakeet.
81. Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.
82. Leave your Christmas lights up and lit until September.
83. Change your name to "AaJohn Aaaaasmith" for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each "a."
84. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
85. Chew on pens that you've borrowed.
86. Wear a LOT of cologne.
87. Listen to 33rpm records at 45rpm speed, and claim the faster speed is necessary because of your "superior mental processing."
88. Sing along at the opera.
89. Mow your lawn with scissors.
90. At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batabatabata-suhWING-batter!"
91. Ask the waitress for an extra seat for your "imaginary friend."
92. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
93. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something
about "psychological profiles."
94. Stare at static on the TV and claim you can see a "magic picture."
95. Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times.
96. Never make eye contact.
97. Never break eye contact.
98. Construct elaborate "crop circles" in your front lawn.
99. Construct your own pretend "tricorder," and "scan" people with it, announcing the results.
100. Make appointments for the 31st of September.
101. Invite lots of people to other people's parties.
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uni!
Mar. 11th, 2008 | 10:45 pm
alright, so i've been in uni for 3 weeks now - 4 including orientation, so that's almost a month. and i guess i've enjoyed it so far. med people are really nice (as expected - almost too nice sometimes, i feel like such a bitch all the time), n i love the freedom. hate the 6am mornings, where i hafta get to lecture by 8.
but monash med reminds me of ip in a lot of ways - its an "integrated" approach, n we don't do as much bio n physiology n anatomy as normal med schools - lots of clinical skills n patient centred learning and tutorials and role-plays and group projects and presentations - which is a lot of fun. oh and the work's startin to pile up - the self-directed learning thing is starting to piss me off, cos a lot of the stuff they give you is so darn vague.
med's a real close faculty - and i couldnt believe some of the people i met in my year. for starters, theres 10 plc girls (biggest group there is i think, besides mlc, who also has 10), so we make up quite a bunch. then i met this dude who went to ais in spore in yr 7 or smth - what are the chances! and there's hui... something or other, who was the vp of council in nj when i was in like ip2 or something. i think there's another nj girl as well but i havent really introduced myself. i was surprised to find this huge group of sporeans in med - i thought they all preferred uk or usa. but then again, we have a 5 year med program - much cooler than those stupid 6-year ones.
donating blood tomorrow - and i just lost like 100ml of blood for blood tests yesterday. and i have my monthlies. losses all around!
ok will update soon.
but monash med reminds me of ip in a lot of ways - its an "integrated" approach, n we don't do as much bio n physiology n anatomy as normal med schools - lots of clinical skills n patient centred learning and tutorials and role-plays and group projects and presentations - which is a lot of fun. oh and the work's startin to pile up - the self-directed learning thing is starting to piss me off, cos a lot of the stuff they give you is so darn vague.
med's a real close faculty - and i couldnt believe some of the people i met in my year. for starters, theres 10 plc girls (biggest group there is i think, besides mlc, who also has 10), so we make up quite a bunch. then i met this dude who went to ais in spore in yr 7 or smth - what are the chances! and there's hui... something or other, who was the vp of council in nj when i was in like ip2 or something. i think there's another nj girl as well but i havent really introduced myself. i was surprised to find this huge group of sporeans in med - i thought they all preferred uk or usa. but then again, we have a 5 year med program - much cooler than those stupid 6-year ones.
donating blood tomorrow - and i just lost like 100ml of blood for blood tests yesterday. and i have my monthlies. losses all around!
ok will update soon.
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SYTYCDAU Top 20 - Rhys & Jemma Waltz
Feb. 19th, 2008 | 09:48 pm
from so you think you can dance australia. its beautiful.
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decided
Feb. 11th, 2008 | 01:40 pm
NINA IS DOING MEDICINE AT MONASH!
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Rove Live - Hamish and Andy The MOB
Feb. 7th, 2008 | 01:56 am
haha i love hamish n andy.
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CHOICES
Feb. 1st, 2008 | 04:56 pm
MEDICINE OR LAW/COMMERCE?
I HATE CHOICES. I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT.
im going half crazy trying to decide whether i wna be a doctor, or a businesswoman. arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. stupid LIFE CHOICES.
I HATE CHOICES. I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT.
im going half crazy trying to decide whether i wna be a doctor, or a businesswoman. arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. stupid LIFE CHOICES.
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australia day!
Jan. 26th, 2008 | 05:42 pm
yep today's australia day, n im bored out of my mind, as usual.
anw ive finally decided, i'm gna be doin law/commerce (double degree) at the Australian National University (anu). im trying to convince myself that canberra is in fact a very happening town with many young people, and not at all a hole. its not, its not! im told its not as bad as they say. yay.
but im so screwed for accommodation. being, well, me, i didnt apply on time and now im majorly screwed, looking around for places to share. problem is, i don't know ANYONE in canberra (not really, anyway), so its hard to like... move around, and see whether the places are suitable, and find furniture and... arghhhhh. so if anybody knows anyone at all going to, or at ANU, or in canberra, plleeeease tell me!
tata
anw ive finally decided, i'm gna be doin law/commerce (double degree) at the Australian National University (anu). im trying to convince myself that canberra is in fact a very happening town with many young people, and not at all a hole. its not, its not! im told its not as bad as they say. yay.
but im so screwed for accommodation. being, well, me, i didnt apply on time and now im majorly screwed, looking around for places to share. problem is, i don't know ANYONE in canberra (not really, anyway), so its hard to like... move around, and see whether the places are suitable, and find furniture and... arghhhhh. so if anybody knows anyone at all going to, or at ANU, or in canberra, plleeeease tell me!
tata
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2008!
Jan. 14th, 2008 | 11:25 am
woah its almost been a month since i updated.
anw 25dec-06jan i was in hk, where i did the usual - relatives, shop, arguewithmother, watchcousinsdvds. weird seein cousin all grown up with his voice broken. strange. and mother didnt let me buy very much ): ocean park rocks still. itll always be my favourite (:
hmm queensland offers came out yesteray. got law at uniqueensland. 1st pref. yay. now to wait for my other offers. southaust, nsw, victoria all come out tmr. see how it goes, yep?
at my grandpa's now. came back to melb on 10th with steph. have been sleeping like crazy for the past few days. shall go to the glen now. ta!
anw 25dec-06jan i was in hk, where i did the usual - relatives, shop, arguewithmother, watchcousinsdvds. weird seein cousin all grown up with his voice broken. strange. and mother didnt let me buy very much ): ocean park rocks still. itll always be my favourite (:
hmm queensland offers came out yesteray. got law at uniqueensland. 1st pref. yay. now to wait for my other offers. southaust, nsw, victoria all come out tmr. see how it goes, yep?
at my grandpa's now. came back to melb on 10th with steph. have been sleeping like crazy for the past few days. shall go to the glen now. ta!
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results out
Dec. 17th, 2007 | 12:40 pm
results came out today.
argh i didnt do horribly but i definitely didnt get what i wanted.
im gna go sulk now.
argh i didnt do horribly but i definitely didnt get what i wanted.
im gna go sulk now.
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eighteen
Dec. 6th, 2007 | 01:57 am
ive had possibly the worst birthday ever. ok, one of the worst. but who am i to judge - ive the memory of a goldfish.
woke up in the morning and found that the hives ive been getting since i got singapore have spread. its an allergic reaction to something or other, and now my entire arms and legs are completely covered with mosquito-bite like things, and worst of all, my FACE too. its completely disgusting and i feel like a wart-faced hag. its disgusting. irks me. argh. and i can feel my back and neck starting to get lumpy too. the doctor said it could last up to a month. ive never felt so ugly in my life. everyone on the streets keeps STARING at me. i feel so repulsive. and it ITCHES and HURTS. and the medicine that the doc gave me makes me all dizzy and emotional and awljhjk ffjas. i hate this.
and mum had to yell at me til i cried. i know it sounds pathetic n all, but the medication and the hives, and everything just.....ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
yeah, but i guess at the end of the day - ive finally turned eighteen. hooray.
woke up in the morning and found that the hives ive been getting since i got singapore have spread. its an allergic reaction to something or other, and now my entire arms and legs are completely covered with mosquito-bite like things, and worst of all, my FACE too. its completely disgusting and i feel like a wart-faced hag. its disgusting. irks me. argh. and i can feel my back and neck starting to get lumpy too. the doctor said it could last up to a month. ive never felt so ugly in my life. everyone on the streets keeps STARING at me. i feel so repulsive. and it ITCHES and HURTS. and the medicine that the doc gave me makes me all dizzy and emotional and awljhjk ffjas. i hate this.
and mum had to yell at me til i cried. i know it sounds pathetic n all, but the medication and the hives, and everything just.....ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
yeah, but i guess at the end of the day - ive finally turned eighteen. hooray.
